Intelligent regulation has emerged as a promising strategy for exploring novel applications of multifunctional metamaterials. Conventional regulation methods are generally constrained by fixed configurations, making achievement of the intended regulation effects difficult. This paper presents a reconfigurable metamaterial with tunable electromagnetic-absorbing and load-bearing performance. The metamaterial integrates highly stretchable fractal kirigami and bistable origami configurations, enabling 3D auxetic deformation. The synergistic deformation mechanisms are analyzed, and a prediction model is established to describe the variation in mechanical and electromagnetic performance during reconfiguration. Furthermore, an integrated genetic optimization is conducted to design a multiband radar stealth metamaterial, achieving an ultra-broad absorption band from 2.7 to 15.6 GHz, with superior electromagnetic performance as the wave incidence angles increase. The synergetic deformation achieves an in-plane strain of ≈40% and out-of-plane strain of over 182%, with a self-locking effect enhancing load-bearing capacity. Traditional origami techniques are leveraged for the innovative reconfigurable metamaterial, providing an available paradigm for tunable electromagnetic design.